Shared Wisdom Guest Post Featuring Tess Marshall

Being deeply loved by someone gives you strength, while loving someone deeply gives you courage – Lao Tzu

Every path to success has been littered with apprehension, ambiguity, and fear – as well as perseverance, calculated risks, and massive action.

The difference between someone who fails and someone who succeeds is the courage to take action, repeatedly.

I got pregnant when I was 17 and was a mom to four daughters under the age of four when I was 22 years old. My last pregnancy was twins. Taking care of them was utter madness at such a young age.

I lived in a constant state of chaos and fatigue. I couldn’t sleep; I was underweight, moody, looked unruly, and I had suicidal thoughts.

The impulse I fought was to leave – to escape and never look back. My biggest fear at the time was, “I’m inadequate.”

In a state of exhaustion, I would cry myself to sleep at night and repeatedly ask my husband, “How do I get off this roller coaster? What am I going to do?”

He never hesitated, his answer was always the same: “You’re going to get up tomorrow morning and put one foot in front of the other. You’re going to do it one step at a time. That’s how you’re going to go forward.”

For the next 22 years, that’s exactly what I did. I followed his advice.

I was young, resilient, and determined. I would focus only on the next step, and I would do what I had to do.

Enormous power emerged from that decision. It was a single defining moment in my life.

Being a mom was the most difficult job I ever had; I made plenty of mistakes. But it was also a time of great joy, laughter, and fun.

The deep emotion that propelled me forward as a young parent was love. I was crazy in love with our wild and precious family. Today the girls are 40, 38, 36 and 36 years old.

I am so grateful that I pushed through my own fear, and now I help others push through theirs.

If fear is holding you back, I have found that the following actions can propel you forward – one step at a time.

• Decide to succeed. Once you make a choice to succeed, you spend your time focusing on what you need to do. Doubt fades away. Your perseverance and dedication help you roll with the punches. You free yourself to make the impossible possible. 

• Chase your fear. Do what scares you. Take a chance. Attend the dreaded networking meeting. Ask for what you need. When you get rejected; ask again. There are seven billion people in the world! Defy the odds. Be bold and brave. 

• Be prepared. Anticipate your own needs. Plan for the future. You are intelligent enough to get out, over, around, and through what could go wrong. Enjoy today. Don’t live in fear; create solutions and a plan in advance. 

• Delete urgency and fear.  Choose to relax. Stay present. Go with the flow. Let go of the pain of the past. Refuse to imagine a dreadful future. This is a great time to be alive. We have the opportunity to make the world a better place for everyone. 

• Know your big why. Focus on the benefits of your success. Keep an image of your desired outcome in mind. When we were young and our children were small, our dream was to escape the cold and dark winters and move to a sunny place. We held that vision for 35 years. Then we moved! When the going gets tough, focus on your “why.” 

• Learn to calm your body. Sit in stillness and focus inward. Notice where fear lives in your body.  You may notice a tense forehead, shallow breathing, or sweaty palms. Relax the part of your body that’s being affected. Fear becomes manageable when you can calm and center yourself easily. 

• Create your own fan base. Most people have good hearts. They want the best for you. Believe people are cheering for you. When you are frightened, imagine your friends and family in one place rooting wildly for you. 

• Participate in life. Take digital breaks, often. Turn off your electronics, television, and all negative media. Take a language class, skydiving lesson, or paddle boarding lesson. Hike the mountains, swim in the ocean, or go for a morning walk or bike ride. 

• You are enough. You are enough, and you do enough. Accept who you are and where you are. Comparing your life to others creates suffering. If I would have compared my life of changing diapers with the lives of my friends in college, I would have been miserable. Thankfully I was too busy to care.

Remember, you are here to risk, invent, love and enjoy life. Please don’t allow fear to stop you from all of that. Just one bold step forward is all it takes.

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Tess Marshall is the founder of The Bold Life, where she blogs and inspires people to do great things. If you are tired of being stuck in fear and want to step into your greatness,  learn more about her life-changing e-course, “30 Days to Bold.”

Ready to Live Boldly?

Early registration is now open for Tess’s 30 Days of Bold Ecourse! 

If you sign up before June 24th, you’ll receive the earlybird discount, tons of great bonus gifts, plus Tess will include her Take Your Fear and Shove it Ecourse for free! 

Click here to learn more and register!

 

Thank you SO much, Tess, for inspiring each of us to push past our fear and reach our dreams!

I am honored to have contributed to this powerful ecourse, and I definitely recommend it to anyone who is looking to live boldly!

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Hugs!

P.S. – Full disclosure: I am a contributor and an affiliate for Tess’s course, which means I’ll receive some money if you join. (Thank you!) I only promote courses and products that I completely believe in, and I would promote this even if I weren’t an affiliate. 🙂