Welcome to Ask Away!

Each week I choose one of your questions and do my best to offer guidance and support to help you along your journey. I also encourage everyone who is reading this to offer their words of wisdom as well by leaving a comment at the end. Please click here to learn more about this feature.

Here is this week’s question, which was sent in by someone who wishes to remain anonymous.

I find myself frequently looking forward to the future – anticipating how great my life will be when I achieve certain goals. How can I learn to be happy today while still setting future goals?

Thank you so much for asking this question. You are definitely not alone in feeling this way. So many of us live our lives in the “I’ll be happy when…” mindset, which never truly allows us to be happy because we are always looking toward the future and never content in the present.

I think it’s great to set goals for ourselves and push and stretch beyond what we thought was possible. Looking forward to the future certainly isn’t a bad thing to do.

However, when we find ourselves only living in the “I’ll be happy when…” mindset and no longer feeling content in the now, we may want to make a few adjustments.

I truly believe that being happy in the present moment begins and ends with two words: gratitude and action.

It is impossible to not feel joyous, happy, and content while you are feeling grateful for all of the blessings in your life. And when you take action toward reaching your goals rather than simply seeing them as dreams in the future, you’ll find that happiness becomes a part of your daily life.

And I bet you do this already without even realizing it!

To show you what I mean, let’s imagine that you have a goal of losing weight. Let’s say that you would like to lose 20 pounds in three months. Do you only keep the end goal in mind while you are weighing yourself at the end of each week? Will you only be happy when you are 20 pounds lighter and not really care about the progress you are making? Of course not! You will celebrate each pound lost and enjoy the process of getting closer to your end goal! You will be so grateful for your progress!

It’s the same with any anticipatory goal we set for ourselves. Our happiness can be found in the present moment and in being grateful for all that we are accomplishing on a daily basis to get us closer to our goal. We don’t have to wait to be happy – we can find happiness right now. And our end goal and our present happiness are certainly not mutually exclusive. Gratitude and daily action are the glue that bind the two together.

Let’s take another example – let’s say that you aren’t happy in your current job. You have set a goal of finding a new job within six months. Chances are, you are going to have to take steps to reach this goal – a job probably won’t appear out of thin air (although it is possible, let’s not count on that happening). So each day you do one thing that will bring you closer to finding this job – you imagine what your ideal job looks like, you picture yourself in this position, you take the necessary steps to be ready for this job (e.g., receive training, send out résumés, etc.), you talk to others about your plans and get excited about the future. Do you see what is happening though as you move closer toward your goal? You are actually finding happiness in the process – in the present moment – rather than simply waiting for the goal to bring you happiness. You are feeling empowered and grateful that you are taking steps to align your ideal life and your actual life.

You never have to wait to be happy. And if your happiness is tied into an end goal – something that you have set for yourself in the future – you can tie that motivation into your present life by being grateful for all of the wonderful blessings around you and also by taking action toward your goal.

I think it’s wonderful that you are goal-oriented and excited about your future! That’s such a great motivator to keep going and keep pushing forward. And you can use this excitement about your future to keep driving you to take action steps in the present to get you there. Remember that gratitude will always ground you in the now. We always have so much to be grateful for.

[One last thing – someone asked a more general question about finding happiness a few weeks ago – not centered around goal-setting. If you would like to read it, please click here.]

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For everyone who is reading, please offer your words of wisdom as well! Let’s all chime in and offer guidance and support for this brave soul who opened themselves up by asking for help!

I would love to answer your question in next’s week’s post!
Please email your question to: info@soulfuljournals.com. (Please put “Ask Away” in the subject line.)

If your question is chosen for that Friday’s feature, I will let you know if I need any additional information. It’s completely up to you if you would like your question to be anonymous or public. If you would like to keep it anonymous, please make sure to leave out any identifying details.