Shared Wisdom Guest Post Featuring Marilyn Tam
How has your first week of the new year been? We start off feeling optimistic and energized – excited for each new possibility. And some of us stay this way – continuing to push forward toward our goals, creating new habits to make sure they happen. But…some of us get discouraged (been there!) – maybe because we got overly excited and set goals without an action plan to reach them. Or maybe the goals that we set weren’t really our goals, but ones that we thought we should strive for. If this sounds familiar, my friend, Marilyn Tam, has written a helpful article to get you back on track. She helps us remember that we created these resolutions to help us live our ideal lives, so rather than beating ourselves up when we get off track, we can instead have fun with them and be proud of ourselves for consciously moving in a direction that feels right for our soul.
You make well-meaning resolutions to improve your life. But your resolutions fade under the stress of multiple demands on your time and attention. Oftentimes the resolutions are history before the month is done. How can we ensure that we actually benefit from the good intentions that we made with such conviction?
Many years ago I made an earnest resolution to work less and to spend more time on my personal life, family, and health. Being a type-A personality, it was easier to say that than to follow through. By late in the same month, as I was running through another airport, I realized that I was already back to my old pattern of working seven days a week. On the next plane ride I took the time to ask myself a few hard questions. From that experience I developed these Five Guidelines to have a Happier, Healthier, and more Successful Life. Isn’t that what we are ultimately after?
- Make resolutions that you can manage. Specify your desired end result and make the goals measureable. For example, instead of saying that you want to lose weight, give yourself a specific time frame for a number of pounds or inches broken down into smaller pieces so that you have incremental targets to meet. Make the objectives a slight stretch but achievable. You are more likely to continue once you see positive progress towards your ultimate goal. Limit the number of resolutions. Your mind can only deal with so many tasks at a time. Limit your resolutions to fewer than seven and prioritize them. That way you can work on them in order of importance to maximize your success potential.
- Review your life mission before you make your resolutions. What are the most important things in your life? When you make your commitments based on what you truly value, instead of what someone else or society tells you that you ought to do, you will be more motivated to work towards them.
- Get Partners and Mentors. There are people who share the same goals you do. Or they have experience in what you are trying to achieve, and/or they would be supportive of your plans. Enlist their support. Form a mastermind group or network to encourage, guide, and support each other. Ask people with experience for advice and inspiration. You can connect in person, by phone, and via the Internet. Having partners and mentors in your goals will keep you motivated. They can also guide and alert you on the pitfalls, secrets, and shortcuts to success.
- Make a Positive Resolution. Make a resolution that involves something fun for you. For example, if you want to strengthen your presentation skills, do something new, say, singing in public. Learn a song and sing it on karaoke. Or learn a new sport, like paddle boarding, yoga, or Pilates. That way you will be working on your self-confidence and your physical fitness in ways that are also fun for you. When we look at the positives in our lives, we are encouraged to keep going. One of the main reasons for dropping our goals is because we feel pessimistic. An optimistic outlook energizes us and moves us towards our goals.
- Relax and Have Fun! You have good reasons to make your resolutions. They improve your life in some way. Allow yourself some latitude when you lapse. You are already making progress when you recognize that you’ve missed the mark. It indicates that you are making an effort. Just pick yourself up and try again. Give yourself credit for each step and the small milestones. Share your success with your buddies, and remember the reason(s) for your resolutions. Life is fun!
Beneath all resolutions is the desire to live a healthy, sustainably balanced life with joy and inner peace. Have a fulfilling, healthy and happy day, month and year!
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Marilyn Tam is an international selling author, speaker, entrepreneur, humanitarian and former CEO of Aveda, President of Reebok Apparel Products & Retail Group and VP of Nike and the founder and Executive Director of Us Foundation. Marilyn wrote her books, How to Use What You’ve Got to Get What You Want and Living the Life of Your Dreams, so that others can learn from the experiences and secrets of successful and happy people and from her own experience. You can find out more about Marilyn on her website www.MarilynTam.com and connect with her on facebook.
If you haven’t read Marilyn’s soulful, in-depth interview here on Soul Speak, please do so! She talks about overcoming obstacles, learning to believe in herself, sharing her mission of helping others with the world, starting her foundation, and her beautiful book, which won the 2011 Global eBook of the Year award in the Inspirational/Visionary category. It’s a must read!
Two book recommendations from Marilyn:
Excessive stress is dangerous and can even kill you. Joan Borsenko’s 2011 book, Fried, Why You Burn out and How to Revive, helps you get to a healthy place of dynamic balance between doing and being.
I believe you should take love advice from couples who have the kind of deep, loving, magical relationship that truly inspires LOVE! Arielle Ford’s new book, Wabi Sabi Love: The Ancient Art of Finding Perfect Love in Imperfect Relationships is being released right now. If your relationship is less than fantastic, this is the solution!
