Lately, my foundation – something that I trusted to be completely solid and unbreakable – began to tremble and shake. Between what’s happening in our country and some unforeseen developments in my personal life, I have felt the cracks beginning to deepen and my footing beginning to feel unsteady. It seemed that so much of what I thought I knew to be true was now in question. Beliefs that I had grounded myself in were no longer supporting me. And I sort of flailed about just trying not to collapse. Definitely not a good feeling.
Over the years, I have written a lot here about the benefits of connecting to our soul and to the universe. I have written a lot about believing that we live in a loving world where goodness and love always win. I have written a lot about gratitude, kindness, and hope. And I have believed it all wholeheartedly. I have experienced it all wholeheartedly. My life is a direct reflection of these beliefs. I am surrounded by so much goodness and love, which I appreciate so much.
When something happens, though, to shake up these beliefs, I find myself completely thrown and having to dig even deeper to find my center again. I feel the need to slow down and go within – hoping that I will somehow make my way back to trust and faith. That’s where I’m at right now. I’m on the way there. I’m not completely there, if I’m being completely honest. But I know that being there is a good place to be, and I know that if I’ve been there before, I will be able to find my way back there again.
In the meantime, I’m allowing myself to feel all of this uncertainty, fear, and disbelief. I’m doing my best to trust that everything happens for such a good reason – even if I don’t have access to that reason in this moment. I’m leaning into all of the times throughout my life when I felt similarly and later saw the wisdom that came from each difficult experience. I’m holding onto Dan a little more tightly than before, and our love is getting us through. We’re like magnets that go to each other to recharge, and when fully charged, we’re able to give so much more to the world. I’m pulling back from the outside world a bit. Re-centering myself. And trusting. I’m putting my faith in all that I’ve written and in all that I believe and am trusting that my soul and the universe will lead me back to my solid foundation in the perfect timing.
While these cracks are here, I’m seeing something and am feeling something so beautiful: my own light. I hadn’t even realized it, but it was becoming a bit dim and now I feel my inner fire coming back again. I feel such a deep strength bubbling up that will soon make its way through the cracks. And I can’t help but be grateful for these difficult experiences that are bringing forth this side of me that had been dormant. I feel myself coming back stronger than ever before. And that is such a good feeling.
So here I am, right smack in the center of all of this uncertainty and unsettledness – believing that something really good is going to come from it all. And I do believe that. That’s what I’m holding onto. That’s what’s helping me in each moment. If you’re feeling at all in a similar place, I hope this is helpful for you, too.
Hugs,
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What an incredibly powerful post, Jodi – full of such wisdom, conviction and raw emotion.
When a blindspot gets revealed, a myth shattered, a belief system dismantled – it rattles our cage and rebirths us in a most uncomfortable way. When we are forced to let go of illusion, we find the blessing of our spirit being transformed to an even greater purpose. We surrender to nothing less than the embodiment of Divine love. May that be true for you, dear friend.
Thank you, Barb! So beautifully said! Big hug to you! XO
Thank you for this post, Jodi! It was like you were writing about my own feelings and fears and search for balance in this time of upheaval. I am still struggling to get to a place where I have faith and hope that these things are happening for a good reason. I do believe that the key is to go inward, like you mentioned. I also need to be better about allowing myself to feel negative emotions and feelings instead of avoiding them. Your post was a good reminder for me. Thank you!
I’m so glad this resonated, Pam! I absolutely agree that allowing ourselves to feel exactly what we’re feeling is such an important part of healing. So glad you’re doing exactly that. Big hug to you. XO
Thank you for this post. Two months ago my foundation all but crumbled, well actually it did crumble. I was slowly climbing up out of the despair one rung at a time and then wham-o, world events (US events) sent me reeling again. There is nothing that feels the same. Working to see the healing and evolution that comes from this space… it is a day at a time… Big love to you. Thank you for sharing your story. It is nice to know I am not alone in my feelings.
Hi Amy,
You’re definitely not alone. So many of us are feeling similarly right now. I’m sending lots of love to you. XO
I think most of us can relate to such times, Jodi. I definitely do and I know a lot of people who do too. What I am learning right now, which might be helpful to you as well, is to simply feel gratitude that all the feelings and emotions that come up from the situation, can now be healed.
You’re not alone with it either, you can put it on the altar of your Higher Self, the Angels, the Universe, the Holy Spirit, God, etc. and heal those feelings together.
I also ask: “What is this feeling/emotion really for?” Because it never is because of the reason you think it is. Then watch closely for the answers that come up through your Higher Self, which can be in many forms. It will surprise you!
Everything I experience is a reflection of my inside world, I don’t always understand this and I don’t have to. I only have to accept this. And not identify with whatever negative feeling we have, by simply reminding myself: “This is not who I AM, I AM Love, I Am Light, I AM whole, I AM complete, I AM perfect and so it IS!” That is what I do today.
Feeling so much gratitude you’re sharing this with everyone, because those who read it, heal together with you. We are ONE! And we share the benefits of our healing. Sending you Love and Light, take good care of yourself! I believe in you! You ARE Powerful beyond measure! No matter what happens! We’re on this healing journey together ♥
So beautifully said, Anja! Thank you for sharing your heart with all of us! You’re so right that we’re all in this together. XO
I feel as though you reached inside of me and pulled out my very own thoughts & feelings, Jodi. I’m experiencing so many unsettling events, blows to confidence & the loss of my Father all at the same time. Your post gives me hope that it is all happening for a reason. I haven’t quite gotten to the point of finding my inner strength. I’m babying myself, taking things day by day & focusing on my health. Reading your post affirmed that I am not alone in this uncertain time & I find great comfort in that. Thank you! Namaste ❤️
My heart goes out to you about your Dad, Tae. I’m so glad to hear that you’re taking extra care of yourself right now. Dan and I continue to send you and your family our love. Big huge hug coming your way. XO
I feel just like you at times Jodi. Most of what you wrote did refer to my own life at times. Currently not healing as quickly as I expected and being kept from doing my work is a crack in my foundation. Before now I had many health issues that held me back. Then one day I learned to turn it around and instead of letting my health run my life I took control and decided to make my soul purpose take over and run my life.
We all sometimes have cracks in our foundations but these cracks eventually make us stronger. All that I have gone through has been a help when I speak with others either doing their card readings or just in general. My sharing usually lifts their spirits because they see how I have changed and how far I have come.
I pray you get past your cracks quickly and learn why you are going through this. You are always such an inspiration to me and I’m sure everyone else.
Thanks for being you!!
Love and Blessings, Catherine <3
Thank you so much for your loving words, Catherine. Love and continued healing to you!
Jodi,
This was so beautiful and inspiring. Your strength and vulnerable wisdom shine through so clearly despite all that you’re going through. There’s so much bravery in leaning into all the hard feelings and trusting that you will get to the other side. I’m so glad you can see your light seeping in through the cracks as your words are a light to us all. I’m sending you so much love and support for all that you are going through and for all the ways it will ultimately deepen and strengthen you. Lots and lots of love to you and Dan.
Thank you so much, Liz! So much love to you, too! XOXO
Well Jodi, in your closing comment I see you practice what you write about and your confidence and positive outlook is showing. We do live in “the world” and life can be unsettling, but with your good grounding you will come out fine. After all, it’s up to each of us to find our way, but with help (like you give) it just a little easier.
Thank you, Robert! Big hug to you!